There and back again

I think I left off on the last post while we were waiting to be released from the Hospital.  Well, we did get to go home on Monday evening.  It is now Thursday.  The first 2 days home were really rough.  Cailynn was super cranky and cried most of Monday night and Tuesday.  Wednesday was better, as she took longer naps during the day and didn't cry so very much, but still wouldn't let me put her down.  Last night we were blessed with a "normal" night and today I have my baby back!!  She is back to her regular eat, sleep, wake, cry patterns and lets me put her down occasionally.
Tuesday was our first visit to the ENT to check our the cyst in her mouth.  We were relieved to hear that it poses no problems right now, so the plan is to check back in 6 months.
Wednesday was the first day in a while that we didn't have to see doctors, so we just enjoyed a day off.
And that brings us to today.  We went back to the urologist at Children's.  He reviewed the DMSA scan (done Monday, pictures posted) and reviewed her hospital stay information.  The scan did reveal that the right kidney has much poorer function than the left one, but beyond that, the radiologist's interpretation is more subjective than objective in our case.  We were told the scan showed the left kidney functioning at about 73% and the right at 27%. 
In light of her infection and to help keep her from getting more, she will be having surgery the first week of August.  In this surgery, the doctor will use a scope and burn a hole in the uereterocele to drain it. This should help decrease the VU reflux which in turn will help to keep her free of infection.  The dangerous part of this surgery is the general anesthesia she will undergo at a mere 8 weeks old.  It is a 45 - 60 minute procedure, but because of the anesthesia, we will have to stay overnight.  It goes without saying that she will need another IV - probably the most traumatic and painful part of the whole procedure this time!!  We are just waiting to hear what day the surgery will be scheduled for.
As I sit here and write so clinically about what is going on, I am trying to sort out my feeling about all this.  We say we are trusting God with all this, but I am unsure exactly what that "looks" like.  Sometimes I feel like a robot, just doing what we need to do, going through the motions and saving all my own thoughts and feelings about it for some other time....??

Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.   1 Peter 5:7